As I sit here once again in the room that used to be Jeannie’s, which I still consider it hers. Things that are mostly scattered are hers but now mine entrusted to me by her. There are things in this room I don’t consider mine. As I grieve along with the rest who dearly loved her and still do like her mom, dad and sister and all the rest that were very close to her I think about the rest of the people that did not show care. Most of them which I have blocked two may come unblocked at some point but not any of her friends that were called the Lupe troop. I don’t care much about them I thought they were all blocked till last night when I read that one of them was still lingering. What is disappointing is that when the end came they all ran to each other not to the ones that needed them or spread lies. I don’t have to name names cause they are already being dealt with in a spiritual manor and will continue to be dealt with by God! I have forgiven all that have transgressed me in anyway but that don’t me I forget. Forgiveness comes easy for me but forgetting unless by some chance I have memory issue’s of my own. You know what though I have to do it simply because God asks me to do such things to be closer to him. I think in all our lives there have been and some continue to still plague us of the wrong they did. What really gets me is that all the ones mentioned before as the Lupe Troop that were at the wedding were liars and did not like me from the beginning. They really only tolerated me because of Jeannie which in reality really means they were that good of friends to Jeannie. Which breaks my heart when it came to her to find out that those people, and yes I said those people, were as oppressive and sinister as the devil. Well I have never been perfect but at least I am willing to admit it. I believe all those thought they were. Now as things take there course I believe they for some reason will be forgotten at some point. They only linger because of things that were said should have never been said. I may have a broken heart from Jeannie passing but its not by the mouths that speak ill will towards others. I so will remember this for the rest of my life. What really bugs me is I was in the house of two that called me to my face “family”, liars they are. You know what God says about liars they are as guilty as murderers, thieves and all the rest that work for the devil. Things will change when God allows it to change. So now that all being said I say this Broken hearts are mended by God alone. Jesus will help all those that want it and follow him to death if he so shall desires it. I will all ways shout his name to the highest places to the lowest. People have no idea what they say or think but I simply only care about what God thinks or says. Nothing else matters about anything in this world except me following God the way he has instructed us to be. Things like I have mentioned above is what weighs me down. It reminds me but does not compare to what the Jewish people went through or what other nationalities went through around WWII or any other war that was about oppression and slavery. We are slaves by people who use words carelessly. Not thinking about what it may cause them or others around them. Not realizing the effects that may incur to others along the way cause by the time this is all said and done the story will be told fully by me without repercussions from those that think just cause you call me family dosent mean for one second that I actually believe you cause I know truth when I hear it. I am more apt to believe someone who goes to learn and educate themselves about God than those mothers who leave their child with there husbands only to find when they get home there son is on the kitchen floor eating a bag of sugar and her husband who is a cop is in the bed asleep. Not judging people or even sins just stating facts that were mention to me by the mother who is by the way a 911 supervisor. Any way I think its time to close this cause I will just keep on and on. I point out the obvious and tell the truth no matter what the cost to me or anyone else. This all need to be said and you know what I feel even better sharing what so called “ friends” can do or say or want to do not knowing that what they said or done can come back to bite them. To all that read this I am sorry if by what I says offends you or causes you to be upset by these words. I said all this to say don’t let the words of the wicked rule you or bring you down and separate your relationship from God. I pray for all those that pray for me and I know who they are. I want to be a good influence to people not a bad one which I want the same for those around me please. Till next time God bless and follow him that gave you life.